0.0 Forever
The Journey
I recently bought a 0.0 sticker that says “don’t care” below it
for my car. I love that sticker what it means to me (basically, it
says “shut up and do it… but don’t brag about it” to me… no
matter what the distance. To others it’s an anti-running sticker,
but I have nothing against running). It was a long journey for me to
get to that sticker. You see, I was once addicted to measuring,
comparing, and competing at everything. Crushing goals. Setting PRs.
Even cooking was an advanced version of the TV series Chopped.
Bicycling was a thrash-and-trash activity that rarely left me
energized, and has broken my body several times over the years. I
tried cross racing… and it is fun but
silly… often held in muddy conditions and breaking components along
with the collective wallets of amateur racers. I did my centuries and
multi-day events. I really didn’t enjoy any of them enough to ever
do them again. Running became silly,
with Tough Mudder and Warrior Dash and Color Run gimmick events…
and seemingly everyone wanting or needing to do a marathon or some
ultra distance event. I remember when marathons were special… not
anymore. I did a marathon in 2004 and it was painful. I literally
took a page out of amateur wrestling retirement traditions and left
my running shoes on the finish line. Triathlons are even more silly…
hauling around and setting up all that equipment and changing while
you’re wet during transitions. I did two and basically wasn’t
enamored with
either of them. Climbing mountains these days
seems to be more about conquering and accumulating summits, or speed
hiking/running, rather than getting in tune with nature. Orienteering
was possibly the best sport for me, but definitely the most humbling…
it reminded me of golf in that one mistake would ruin your event…
and I cared too much about doing well. I haven’t done too much else
over the years in terms of adult sports. Now I still do most of these
things alone. At least mountaineering and orienteering aren’t on
Strava. And you can’t do them as a group workout on Peleton. And
they don’t have stickers… Everyone seems to have 26.2, 70.3,
140.6, 50K, 100m, and 200m stickers these days. Nothing is special
anymore.
I recently moved to an area that keeps me out of car traffic for the
most part, so I don’t depend on group rides for safety anymore. It
also takes the competitive parts away from riding for me. Perfect. I
just ride. But less than ever and I don’t miss certain parts of
cycling… the elitist, tech-driven and competitive sides of
bicycling culture... I don’t miss them at all. No Strava uploads to
compare myself to others and no segments. Nobody pulling me. Often I
don’t even a use a GPS to record the ride at all. I haven’t
recorded a ride since August… so going on several months now. If I
go slow for any reason, I don’t get home and look at my speed and
feel guilty about it anymore. I don’t care about my annual miles,
feet of climbing, calories burned, etc. It’s awesome. Trust me…
less is so much more. If you don’t believe me, read You Are Awesome
by Neil Pasricha.
I don’t run much anymore. I am 5’9” and the least I’ve
weighed since high school was 175. Everything I have read that is not
written by someone biased toward running says that running is not
good for heavier and muscle-bound people. There’s too much joint
tissue wear and tear. There’s a reason world class runners of any
sex or height rarely weigh over 150. So given the research and my
body weight I don’t run much anymore. Now I hike and break into a
run if I am late and need to get back to my car before dark. So
running serves at least one purpose. ;-)
You’ll not catch me doing things that will mess up my bike… no
mud or grit. Maybe sand someday if I get a fat tire bike. I love my
bikes. I want to ride them and look at them... not pour time and
money into them washing and fixing them.
When I hike/climb it’s generally solo. Generally slow. With more
pictures and reflection. I map routes but generally don’t record my
own hikes of them. I try to memorize everything before going and not
use electronics or maps whenever I can.
Orienteering is simpler now, too. If I don’t like the course/map
and it’s above my pay grade, I bail and check out and go back to my
car after a decent amount of time... and find a craft brewery. Cheers
to the occasional failure!
The Realizations
The constant pressure to progress/suceed?… fuck that. Growth is not
a guarantee in everything all the time. That’s a ridiculous notion
only held in modern times. We’ve fallen into a trap. Constantly
pushing yourself is fine… until it’s not. And you get hurt. Or
sick. Or lose relationships (or stay alone) because of twisted
priorities. Or you simply get older. At some point as we age there is
physical regression. This is inarguable, yet denied by so many
people. A lot of you can’t even piss a straight line anymore and
are still trying to increase your mileage or improve your 50K times.
That doesn’t make any sense to me. What ever happened to aging
gracefully? You can do what you want. But
I find what I call “Type A++ people”
lacking in reality and really boring to me. All they want to talk
about is equipment and metrics and tech in their sport of choice. But
that’s just where I’m at right now.
I just don’t care anymore. About my progressions or regressions…
or yours. About my accomplishments... or yours. I’ve never been
happier. Not giving a shit is absolutely blissful. You get to focus
on the doing, not the progression or the outcomes. Being in the
moment or being mindful becomes commonplace. Even with all the change
in thinking I’ve experienced lately even I still need to learn to
slow down and take more pictures… I’m notorious for never
stopping to admire the views or to learn something at a historical
marker while riding bicycle. Old habits die hard. I have sucked at
slow for years… but it’s changing.
Outside
of professional sports where stats and accomplishments mean so much,
athletic endeavors are mostly bullshit,
except for the fact they can improve your health (to a point). Beyond
health benefits there’s little else. Very few of us have people
that love us because of what we do or have done athletically. If
someone loved me because I can ride a bike 100 miles I’d say they
were pretty shallow. Like so many things that seemingly “matter”
in our social media driven dystopia… It’s just another false
value.
So, if you wonder what I think of all that I’ve done and have seen
others do? Not much. Your stickers don’t impress me. I am glad for
you if you’re active though. Our body is our only ticket through
this life. There is no arguing that.
What’s Next?
I get needing challenges. I really do. Overcoming challenges is very
fulfilling. Many of us have to be challenged to happy. But anybody
can do the physical stuff unless one is totally disabled. It’s
usually the easiest kind of challenge, and if its group oriented it
also satisfies our tribal tendencies. So I understand the group
activity craze, even if it’s not for me. In this time and place I
think we overlook that the challenges of the mind have gone by the
wayside. What’s harder… riding 100 miles or learning a new
language? What’s harder… a marathon or being in control of your
emotions in your work and personal relationships? What’s harder…
a triathlon or a painting, perfectly executed on canvas as you had
imagined it?
The world is tugging at our shirt for our attention and time. Reading
this blog, you may think I’m suggesting limits for people. Not at
all. I’d say realistically do everything you can. The key word is
realistically. I’d say you should answer every calling you have the
time and energy to answer. Just don’t lose yourself, your health,
your loved ones, and your friends in the process, though. And, in the
spirit of service, sometimes you need to set your own dream down for
a minute to help someone you love (or someone you don’t even know)
achieve theirs. And I’d also say challenge yourself to do something
that’s timeless and leaves a tangible legacy. What if you did that
painting and gave it to your son or daughter? They’d likely never
throw it away. Always display it. It would always remind them of you.
In 20 years when you’re dead and gone that marathon medal probably
won’t be as much comfort as that painting.
Real World Legacies
I read an obituary for a colleague of mine that died in 2018 at 85
years old. He was an interesting man. Inspiring. I thought about him
a lot over the years. Here is an excerpt from his obituary…
“… he
started
his career sweeping floors in a warehouse and rose to be the top
motivation and education trainer in his field. He excelled in all
sports including winning the Golden Gloves in boxing, two World
Championships in fast pitch softball, and ran 112 marathons. He loved
life and lived it to the fullest by traveling around the world.”
His
sporting achievements were awesome. I seem to remember that all of
his marathons came after 50 years old as well. But read those first
and last statements. He went from sweeping floors to motivational
speaking and a subject matter expert… an amazing progression. I
don’t think he ever graduated from high school. He loved life and
learning and that’s what led him to excel professionally beyond his
education and aptitude. I remember doing a seminar with him in St
Louis back in the 90’s… he said he had a marathon to do in about
3 weeks, but he was just going to grit it out because he wanted to
travel with his wife and kids somewhere, and proper training just
wasn’t in the cards this time. You have to respect his priorities.
I
watched an episode of Running Wild With Bear Grylls recently that
featured Shaquille O’Neal. He has his priorities straight at his
age, after a life of athletic accomplishments. He was king of his
sport once, so I guess it’s a
lot easier
to move to the couch once you’ve been the
king.
There’s nothing left to prove… not even to himself. He’s just
having fun now without being too serious about anything. I think I’ll
join him, even
if I haven’t been king.
All
of this is really a discussion about legacy. As a kid-less man, I
consider my only legacy as me... as in how I treat others. How I
inspire others to be their best, most complete self. That is a
daunting challenge for me. But it is a worthy one. I’ll keep at it…
and challenge you to do the same in all facets of your life. Not just
physical endeavors. But to
me,
even challenging
others to be their best self is
walking a fine line. I want to encourage others, not influence them.
I want you to do what you decide to do, not what I think you should
do or what I think you are capable of doing. If you have people in
your orbit telling you what your dreams and goals should be or
shouldn’t be and what you’d be better served by doing, kindly
thank them for their insightful advice before telling them to bugger
off. What you do and what you decide to accomplish is your business
to determine and execute. I
see so amny examples of poor encouragement. People share their
results and others say things to
them
like “double it next year” or some
other “growth” suggestion. Also,
we should not point at a person and talk about their unfulfilled
potential. Maybe that person feels totally fulfilled with their life.
Mind your own damn business. Not everyone needs to be “Type A++”
like
you.
I’ve
supported a lot of you crazy folks reading this in the lunacy of your
physical goals. I don’t remember ever saying to someone that they
can’t or shouldn’t do something because I think it’s crazy. So
keep on your own path. I’ll do the same. My support may be loud,
or
quiet and subtle. We may have nothing in common in terms of life and
goals at
this point.
But I will still be out here somewhere thinking of you.
